TRANSFORMATION

We live a transactional life, which rarely leads to transformation.

Money facilitates transactions. However, money can bring about transformation if you see it as a partner in your life with whom you have a relationship.

We engage with people at a transactional level. Rarely do we dig deep and get to know someone so well that the relationship leads to transformation.

Even the way we deal with our health is transactional. We go on a diet to lose weight. And its job done when we get to the weight we want. But only a deep dive into your body brings about a transformation in your health.

Transformation is central to improving your well-being by deeply restructuring your life. Changing your job may feel good when you make the move, but it’s a transaction that will feel stale before long. It does not address the deeper malaise in your life.

Transformation from past mistakes

Look back on your life, and you will find a catalogue of mistakes, mainly frivolous but some serious, even life-changing.

You have two ways of dealing with your mistakes (and this also applies to how you deal with the errors of others, a good way of looking at yourself in the mirror of others’ mistakes).

You can take a restorative approach. Be kind to yourself and others, and help yourself to learn and grow from your mistakes. It is a process of transformation, helped by writing your story with honesty and compassion.

Alternatively, take a retributive approach. If you are inclined to denigrate the mistakes of others, to treat others as outcasts and criminals, you probably also beat yourself up over your mistakes. Your self-worth dives, and you see yourself as useless.

The retributive approach can be very damaging. Even though many people supported and helped me when I made a grave mistake as a young man, the retributive effects of the justice system caused long-lasting and deep harm beyond what my transgression merited.

Your challenges change you.

Then, there is the transformation and growth we experience when we deal with challenges and problems in the future.

If we ignore them, we stay as we are. However, by addressing them, we learn, grow and deliver a transformation in ourselves.

I remember being catapulted into a marketing role, responsible for improving the sales of a range of unit trusts. I was unprepared for the role, but I did what I could to bring myself up to scratch and transformed myself into someone capable of doing the job.

The best way to deal with future challenges is to accept they exist and plan how to deal with them.

Recognise and accept past mistakes and future challenges because they help you learn, grow and lead to your transformation.

TAKE IT FURTHER

Reflect

Here are four points of view on which to reflect. Think of stories relating to the question and ask yourself what happened, so what and what next.

• True transformation often asks us to let go of certainty, self-image, and expectations. Where are you holding on tightly, and what might open up if you surrendered a little?
• Remember when you were thrown into unfamiliar territory, like the marketing example in my post. What internal resources did you uncover? What did you have to let go of to move forward?
• Are you quick to judge, punish, or suppress? Or do you embrace mistakes as stepping stones to wisdom, humility, and deeper human connection?
• Reflect on the nature of your financial decisions. Are you using money only to get things done, or are you intentionally aligning your spending, saving, and investing with your values, goals, and deeper life story?

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Attributions and references

Photo attribution

Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash

Audio link

https://audio.com/jeremy_deedes/audio/transformation/

ABOUT

I work with ambitious, family-oriented professionals transitioning to independent consultants to create a 3 to 5-year holistic plan so that they grow wealthy, make a difference and find meaning.

My clients are aged 35-50. They are in a long-term relationship with family and parents who are supportive but ageing. They wrestle with personal and financial responsibilities and dream of more control, wealth, time and purpose.

If this excites you, you are coachable, willing to change, and want to stop going around in circles, then find out more at jeremydeedes.com

Then, take your next step and explore your way forward with a Mapmaker, a one-off online coaching gig to help you decide your options, assess our compatibility, and determine whether we are the right fit. Mapmaker is excellent value, held in confidence and without further commitment.

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Your views are important, and your fellow readers would love to hear your opinion, so share your thoughts in the comments box below, and thank you for your time and generosity.